One Flesh
Gen 2:21And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. 22Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He [h]made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. 23And Adam said:
“This is now bone of my bones
And flesh of my flesh;
She shall be called [i]Woman,
Because she was taken out of [j]Man.”
24Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be[k] joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
Matt 10:2 The Pharisees came and asked Him, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” testing Him.
3 And He answered and said to them, “What did Moses command you?”
4 They said, “Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce, and to dismiss her.”
5 And Jesus answered and said to them, “Because of the hardness of your heart he wrote you this [a]precept. 6 But from the beginning of the creation, God ‘made them male and female.’ 7 ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, 8 and the two shall become one flesh’; so then they are no longer two, but one flesh. 9 Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”
Growing up in church this was always interpreted as sex between a husband and wife. However, upon researching it more over the past few months I am convinced it is more than that.
1 Corinthians 7:14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise (K)your children would be unclean, but now they are holy.
Consider the story of Lot and his wife. Due to Lot's belief in God (as troubled as he was) his wife was saved from the city with him, till she directly disobeyed.
Ahab and Jezebel, they were judged by God for each other’s deeds.
Eph 5:28 So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. 30 For (AR)we are members of His body, [h]of His flesh and of His bones. 31 (AS)“For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the (AT)two shall become one flesh.” 32 This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church.
The Bible parallels the relation of a husband and wife with the relationship between God and man all over the place. It’s even got a whole book dedicated to just that! Song of Songs.
Gal 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me
When we start looking at a true relationship with God it is one of total honesty, no secrets, no darkness, nothing hidden, being fully exposed to Him.
Psalm 139
Gen 2:25 (A)And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not (B)ashamed.
To be truly in a relationship with your spouse is to be fully known by them, nothing hidden, no secrets, fully exposed to one another. Not just physically, but in every area, spiritually, emotionally and mentally.
I believe that is what God designed as one flesh, no longer 2 people but one person, joined physically and spiritually. Complementing one another, competing one another. One of the most beautiful examples of this is when a couple is both following after God (God is love, so if you really want to be joined together according to His design, He has to be at the center of it all) they can be physically apart from each other and having the same revelations. Have you ever heard of some one going to a husband and wife separately and being told the exact same thing? Or when they are talking they are finishing each other’s thoughts? I have had times when God has told me to reach out to someone. But since they were a female it would be in appropriate, but my wife was able to step out and speak to this person! When you start looking at it this way the power and ability of a married couple is amazing!
Ecclesiastics 4:10 For if they fall, one will lift up his companion.
But woe to him who is alone when he falls,
For he has no one to help him up.
11 Again, if two lie down together, they will keep warm;
But how can one be warm alone?
12 Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him.
And a threefold cord is not quickly broken.
No wonder the enemy wants to destroy marriages!
Ok we have talked about the spiritual side of being one flesh. I would be amiss if I didn’t talk about the physical side. To be honest, I have struggled to understand this for many years. I knew it was more than just a physical act because God designed it as something sacred between a husband and wife. Some people will debate this to being “frustrated” but when 2 people are physically intimate, they treat each other differently. The little things don’t bother them as much. But, how does this all tie in biblically?
1 Corin 7:4The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
In this scripture sex in a marriage is being place in the same category as food (fasting) and prayer! Don’t hate me, I didn’t say it the Bible did. This is not to be used as ammunition against a spouse! Love is patient, love is kind, it is not self seeking.
But how is sex spiritual? I was still struggling with this question. Then God pointed out to me water baptism. Water baptism is a physical act with spiritual meaning when done unto the Lord. There are actually a lot of physical acts that have spiritual significance . Prayer, singing worship songs, water baptism, Old Testament sacrifices, the cross! When we are physically intimate with our spouse unto the Lord we are honoring Him and spiritually binding ourselves together, husband, wife and God. In Gods amazing love, He also made it a way we can serve each other in a private, enjoyable way.
Since I am talking about such sensitive subjects, I might as well go all the way.
One of the ways you can tell that sex is so important spiritually, is the fact that I can not find one single thing that the enemy had perverted and twisted in more ways than sex. It is supposed to be a physical binding, and an earthly representation of intimacy with God. I believe that one of the tactics of the enemy is to distract us from marital physical intimacy. This comes in socially taboo ways of pornography, lust, adultery. But it also comes in socially acceptable ways like lack of desire, television, or novels. In speaking to couples I have found that this is not primarily a female thing as society tells us, but it is a joint male/female thing. These are all things that try to distract us from the design God has created. Because when we are one, and we have even a small glimpse of intimacy with God it unleashes power that the enemy cannot overcome.
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